Seeing Black Read online

  “God, you’re cranky and way too chatty in the morning.”

  “I’m not cranky. I’m tired. That stupid bomb alarm thing made me hit my head.”

  “Super fucking cranky,” Alexander interrupted and turned around to face Jill.

  “I am not fucking cran—” She was getting out of bed, crankily, when he reached towards her with his long arm and pulled her back to bed by her waist. She yelped, surprised. “Let me go, Xander. We have to get ready for class. We can’t miss another day.”

  In a swift motion that caught her off guard, he straddled her. The sheets fell off him. Apparently, he was naked too. “So in the mornings you’re kind of bitchy.” He looked up as if he were deep in thought. “I can deal with that.” He smiled his gorgeous smile that made her not be so bitchy. He leaned down, but Jill quickly put her hand over her mouth. His forehead landed on hers. “What now?” he said, annoyed.

  She mumbled something he couldn’t understand, so she had to repeat it but still with her hand on her mouth. “Morning breath.”

  Alexander chuckled. “You have a lot of issues, Red. I love you. I really do, but seriously, babe, you have to get that stick out of your ass and loosen up a little. Do you really think I give a fuck about morning breath? I’m on top of you, and we’re both naked. The only morning issue you should worry about is my morning wood.” He said the last part with a smirk and looked down and wiggled his brows up and down. Then he plucked Jill’s hand away from her mouth and proceeded to kiss her. “Oh, and Oly is in the next room, so you may want to keep it down a little.” He slid both hands under her, grabbed her bottom, and pulled her closer to him, simultaneously pinning her down. He plunged into her without much warning, except for a devilish smirk. Her back arched into him, and she had to bite her lip to keep from moaning and screaming from ecstasy and surprise. He leaned down and covered her mouth with his mouth, muffling the noise.

  Her legs wrapped around his waist, and she clawed his back as he thrust in and out of her. “Oh, my.” Quicker and faster than she could believe possible, she came in an explosion of uncontrollable orgasms, and then he plunged into her again as he found his release, surprising her. It was fast, it was good, and she was most definitely not cranky any longer.

  He lay on top of her as he tried to regain his breathing then jackknifed up, bringing her with him. “We’re running late. Hurry up, babe. You can’t keep making me miss class.” He slapped her behind as he walked into the en-suite bathroom.

  “Ow!” She padded after him. “I am not the one who is making us late. You and all your sex, that’s the problem.”

  Alexander was already in the shower, hair lathered, when she stepped inside. “Me and all my sex? I don’t know what you’re talking about. You totally attacked me. I was sleeping.”

  Jill shoved him aside and began to shower. “Stop talking and hurry up.”

  He kissed her shoulder and together they quickly showered and went to class.

  ***

  As soon as she got home from school, after she pried herself away from Alexander’s goodbye-kiss grip, she began doing laundry. It was driving her crazy. Messes weren’t her thing. Organization. Cleanliness. Order. Those were her things.

  She spent the better part of an hour, while she waited for the first load to finish drying, researching costumes for the upcoming party. When she heard the buzz from the dryer, she got up from her bed, but as she closed the screen on her laptop, all her senses paralyzed.

  Sweaty palms.

  Flushed cheeks.

  Blackness. All-consuming blackness.

  Her unseeing eyes burned. Her ears rang from the blood rushing upwards.

  Jillian still felt the heat in her cheeks and ears and the incessant beating of her heart when she came back to reality. Usually, Jill didn’t know how long she’d been out because time ceased to exist when she had a psychic vision. The visions overtook all her senses, and she was hyper-focused on whatever it was she saw in her mind. But these last two visions, this one and the one a few days ago on the island, were fast and intense, just mere flashes. In fact, they weren’t premonitions at all. They were coming from a particular person reaching out to her. She knew no more than five minutes had lapsed, because she didn’t lose sense of time as she normally did. He came into her subconscious and left a message like a mental voicemail. He being some man dressed as a doctor. She had no clue who he was. The message came in loud and clear: You don’t come see Rocco soon, we kill your friends. There was no beating around the bush. It was a warning plain and simple. It was the second time it had happened—once right before she left the island a couple of days before and now. Still shaky, she dried her sweaty palms on her thighs, straightened her spine, and reined herself in before picking up the phone to call Rocco. She wasn’t sure if he was directly responsible for these visions, but she was pretty certain he knew something about them.

  “Hey, your clothes are dry. Can I use the dr—” Heather stopped speaking; obviously, she had noticed the change in Jill’s demeanor. She ran towards her. “Are you okay? What’s going on?”

  “Nothing. Just a little jet-lagged is all.” The lingering effects of her flushed face were a telltale sign that something had happened.

  “Did you have a psychic thingy, honey?”

  “No.” Jill realized she responded too abruptly and too shakily.

  “Honey?”

  “No, really, I’m just tired. You needed something?” She felt guilty about lying, but really, was it a lie? It wasn’t a “psychic thingy” as Heather had so eloquently put it. It was really just a request.

  Well, a demand.

  Actually, it was a threat.

  Damn it!

  “I was just going to ask if the dryer was free.” Heather stared at Jill, questioningly.

  “Yeah, I was about to go get my clothes out now.” She shuffled, tired and frazzled, towards the door, leaving a concerned Heather behind.

  A rasp from the front door stopped her in her tracks. What now?

  Jill looked out her window to see who it was before opening the door, something she had started doing a few months ago after someone, who turned out to be her father, had broken in and left her a note. Now Heather and Jill always made sure they locked the door before leaving anywhere and always looked before opening it. Jill opened the door, and as she was going to say, “Hi,” Alexander reached forward and grabbed her waist and pulled her towards his chest.

  His teeth nipped her lower lips as his arm tightened hard around her waist and lifted her towards his chest. She was now on her toes, back arched. A soft moan escaped.

  “Okay, seriously, you two? Chocolate cake! That’s all I’m going to say. Chocolate cake!” Heather scoffed as she walked by.

  “Chocolate cake?” Alexander asked.

  “Don’t ask.”

  “You’re flushed. You okay?” He slightly crouched down and cradled her face to meet her gaze.

  “It was a hell of a kiss. Of course I’m flushed.”

  “Yeah, I am a great kisser, aren’t I?”

  “And modest too.” She giggled and broke away from his grip. “Make yourself at home. I have to finish my laundry since you clearly didn’t give me time last night.”

  “I came to get some books I left here before our trip, but now that I’ve seen you, hurry up, ’cause I want to take you home.”

  “I am home.”

  “No, my home. Suddenly, I have plans.” He smiled devilishly.

  “Plans?”

  Alexander wagged his eyebrows up and down and slightly patted her butt as she walked away. In the safety of her room, Jillian contemplated how she was going to call Rocco. Her life with Alexander would undoubtedly be full of love and excitement, but his possessiveness wouldn’t allow her to have a moment to herself, especially if he suspected she was in any sort of danger. What he didn’t account for was that the person in danger was actually him—and his brother and Heather.

  She didn’t want Alexander to overhear, and since he ten
ded to hover, she’d certainly be heard if she called her father, even if she whispered. She could try and channel him as she had a few days ago, but she wasn’t sure if that had even worked, since she received another message a few minutes ago. She decided on a quick text. Everyone texted nowadays, right?

  Jillian: Rocco, I have a few things to take care of. Will see you Sunday at your home. Please text me your address, and please stop messaging me. I always keep my word. I just need a few days to settle in.

  Less than a minute later, her phone rang. She was unfamiliar with the number, but it was a local Texas number, and she was fairly certain it was Rocco.

  “Hello,” she whispered.

  “Why are you whispering, child?” It was Rocco.

  “Listen, I’ll be there Sunday. I can’t talk now.” She was crouching by her bed silently, hand over her lips, as if that would stop the noise from traveling, praying Alexander wouldn’t walk in.

  “You can explain on Sunday. If you’re early, we can enjoy breakfast together. However, I don’t understand what you mean about messaging you.”

  “You know exactly what I mean, Rocco. Don’t play dumb.” She was whisper-shouting, and when she realized it, she took a deep breath and continued, quieter. “I’ve been getting messages from someone dressed like a doctor telling me that if I don’t come to meet you soon he’ll hurt my friends. I don’t like threats.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about. I would never hurt anyone. I’ll get to the bottom of this. Don’t worry. I’ll see you Sunday. I’ll send you my address via text message. Bye, Jillian.”

  Without another word, Jillian hung up and took a deep breath before she straightened up and turned around. But as soon as she stood and turned, she crashed right into a solid rock-hard wall and yelled out loud.

  Umph!

  She clutched her chest as she grumbled, nervous as to how much he’d heard. “Now that we’re together, I’d hoped you would stop scaring me. You’re like a ninja, quiet and sneaky. My God, one day I’m going to have a heart attack. I just know it.”

  “Who was that?” Alexander asked, his jaw set tightly and his arms crossed.

  She was prepared to lie, but the look of concern plastered on his face and the love seeping from his pores . . . Well, she just couldn’t do it. “It was Rocco,” she blurted out.

  “I figured as much, since you were whispering. I didn’t hear what you two were talking about, but whatever it was, I don’t care. I don’t want you to see him or talk to him, Jillian.”

  “I don’t like myself like this.” She waved her arms around. “Crouching down, whispering, keeping secrets, all to avoid you acting all crazy possessive.”

  “It’s not possessive. It’s protective.”

  “Possessive. Protective. It’s all the same thing. I know you’re worried, and I appreciate your concern. I really do. One of the reasons I love you so much is because of you’re crazy-protectiveness. It reminds me that I’m not alone anymore, but I’m still the same Jillian, the independent woman who has to be able to make her own decisions. You’re just going to have to trust my judgment from time to time.” She reached forward and placed her palms on his chest. “He’s my father. I want to hear him out. I’d like to get to know him. I made plans to have breakfast with him on Sunday.”

  “Fine, we’ll go Sunday, but—”

  “No, no, no. We,” she moved her fingers back and forth between them, “will not be going to breakfast. I will be going to breakfast. Alone. Listen, Xander. I appreciate your concern. I really do. I’ve been on my own for a long time. I can’t be smothered, and you love to smother. It’s your thing.” She air-quoted the word thing. “I want to understand more about myself, and he’s the only one who can help me. I would like to go on my own. Please. I’ll give you the address so that you know where I’ll be. I will even give myself a time limit.” She held out three fingers. “Three hours. If I’m not back within three hours, you can call the police or break down the door—whatever a caveman does to get his woman back.” She smiled, trying to lighten the tension.

  “I like that. My woman. I like when you say that. You are my woman. Fucking finally!”

  Jill laughed. “Seriously? Is that all you got out of my entire little speech?”

  “No, I also got that you need some independence, so fine, I’ll lay off, but you have two hours. Okay?” He held out two fingers. “If you’re gonna be longer than that, you’ll call me?”

  “Of course.”

  “I don’t like this, Jill.”

  “I know you don’t, but thank you for understanding, Xander.” She reached up and pulled his head down to meet her lips and planted a soft, gentle open-mouthed kiss on his lips. It quickly turned insane and frenzied, and he seemed to forget all about Rocco.

  Chapter 2

  Any man whose errors take ten years to correct is quite a man.

  -Oppenheimer

  The week flew by, and Saturday finally arrived. It humored Jill to see Heather so frazzled.

  “So what’s the plan? How are you gonna get the boys here tonight?” Heather asked.

  “I told them to come over.”

  Incredulously, Heather asked, “That’s it? Just come over?”

  “Yep, that’s it. I said I was going to order food and rent some movies. That was all it took.”

  “Hmm? Usually I have to plot and scheme for weeks. The obvious never occurred to me.”

  Jill laughed. The obvious was the only thing that had occurred to her. “I’ve never thrown a party. Will people come?”

  “Oh, hon’, people will come. Trust me. The boys have a following.”

  “I’m sure they do.” Jill rolled her eyes. Her twins were hot. She knew it and so did everyone else.

  “Oh stop fussing. He only has eyes for you. Go wash that green right off your face, sugar. Then you can help me hang these streamers.” Heather held some crepe paper in her hand.

  “I am not jealous.” Jill tore the crepe paper out of Heather’s hand. “Give me that.”

  “Ouch! Sure you’re not.” Heather shook the hand that was just assaulted by Jill’s non-jealous fit. Their scowls were interrupted by a knock. Heather peaked through the window.

  “Shit. It’s the boys! Hide the bags of decorations. Actually, get those guys out of here. They’ll know something’s up,” Heather said, frantically.

  “Wow, look at you—cursing and everything.” Jill mocked Heather while hiding whatever she could grab.

  Jill stepped towards the door and opened it just enough to stick her head out, fidgety.

  “Hey, guys, what’s up?” She tightened her grip around the door when Oliver took a step forward. Her foot tapped behind the door, something she did when she was nervous.

  “You’re not going to let us in?”

  “Uh, er, Heather’s getting dressed.” She was a terrible liar; this she knew. She became nervous, stammered, and began to sweat. The whole enchilada.

  “In the living room? Why would she be getting dressed in the living room?” Alexander asked.

  Why would Heather be getting dressed in the living room? Um, good question. Change of subject. Change of subject. Change of . . . “Wh—why are you guys here?” She cleared her throat. Her grip tightened on the door.

  “We were going to grab some Chinese food for lunch, and Alexander wanted to come pick you up. Apparently, he can’t eat without you now. Suddenly, you’re attached at the hip. It’s a little disturbing, actually.”

  From the other side of the door, Heather yelled. “Yes! I agree. It’s like an overdose of chocolate cake.” Jill heard a thump behind her and an “Ow!” Keeping her grip tight on the door, she looked back to see Heather tangled in crepe paper and clutching her elbow in pain. Jill’s eyes opened, silently questioning Heather. Heather whispered. “Ouch! I hit myself on my funny bone. Not freakin’ funny! Ow!” She whisper-shouted while continuing to fight with the crepe paper while holding her elbow and trying to slip on her shoes.

  “What’
s up with the chocolate-cake references? She keeps saying that.” Alexander asked.

  “Don’t mind her. She’s just jealous. Can’t stand to see you and me kissing.” Jill reached forward to kiss Alexander chastely on the lips, still gripping the door. Even she could feel her own lips tremble. It was an awkward kiss. “Come on. Let’s go eat. Heather, you coming?” Jill yelled behind her.

  “Shoot. Ouch. Y-yeah. I am.” Heather stepped outside, winded, flushed, and still nursing her elbow. She slammed the door shut behind her, straightened her backbone, and walked out. She took a deep breath and said, “Okay. Let’s go.”

  “You two are acting weird. Weirder than usual. You’re out of breath.” Oliver pointed to Heather while Alexander grabbed Jill’s hand and began to walk towards the car.

  “Yeah, just getting dressed. Anyhoo, Chinese? Yum.” Heather! Master of changing the subject.

  Jill took her keys out of her pocket. “I’ll drive.” Alexander immediately snatched the keys from Jill’s hand. “Hey. Give me that back. It’s my car. I drive.”

  “I want us all to be able to eat today, and with your driving, we’ll never get there,” Alexander smirked.

  “Well, I’d rather get there in one piece than have an accident with you driving and never arrive at all.” Jill had her hands on her waist as her leg tapped the floor. Tap. Tap. Tap.

  “God, one night—just one night without fighting—that’s all I ask,” Oliver said, snatching the keys out of Alexander’s hands.

  “We’re not fighting, brother. We’re just having a difference of opinion.” As he said that, Alexander plopped his arm around Jill’s shoulder and leaned in and gave her a loud wet kiss on the cheek. Jill rolled her eyes but couldn’t help smiling.

  “I’d thought the bickering would have stopped once you two finally hooked up.”

  “Y’all are crazy. Give me those keys. I’m driving,” Heather said as she yanked the keys from Oliver’s hand and skipped merrily towards the car, leaving the three of them at a loss for words. She looked like a teenager instead of a twenty-five-year-old woman with her long hair slicked back into a perfect ponytail, wearing sneakers, shorts, and an old retro-looking tight t-shirt that said “Goonies” on it.